justin_guber - @ 20six.co.uk

So here I am again...

...sitting in Starbucks on my extended weekend, knowing full well that my colleagues are going through hell at this very moment in time.

See, in preparation for my extended weekend, I prepared all the stuff I needed to for our current job. Only to discover after a wonderful Sunday spent with my girlfriend that our servicing people threw all our hard work back at us and want us to start again from scratch.

At that exact moment of the call, around 9.30pm on that very Sunday, I experienced my first instant stress related migraine.

The fucker shot into the right side of my brain like a bullet. Suddenly whenever I opened my mouth too wide, the same spot would hurt like hell. I couldn't open my right eye for the rest of the night.

The thing with me is this: I often fill the most of my day with a ton of stuff. There's work, obviously, then there's the music thing, be it recording or rehearsing, and of course there's girlfriend. My extended weekend was to be filled with recording sessions at Saiful's house for Y2k. The possibility that I may have to come back in the office on Labour Day weekend was too much to bear. I don't like it when my schedule is fucked with. It pisses me off beyond compare.

And the thing is, even though my colleague is telling me that it's ok and I probably don't have to come in, the thought of all them designers and art directors in the office working their ass off whilst the writer is playing his guitar somewhere else does fill my heart with a slight pang of guilt. I also don't like the thought of the team having to work over a Labour Day weekend of all weekends. Not exactly a morale booster.

But the recording sessions went well.

I've gotten into my groove as far as this DIY sound engineering lark goes. We've got about 4 songs done-ish (drums, 1st guitar and bass). It would've been five if the drummer kept to the fucking metronome.

Two or three more weeks and I definitely see this album finished. Whoopee.

3.5.05 14:53

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The Guilt of Being Me

So I come in to work after my extended weekend to discover that not only did the team have a shitty-ass time getting that job done that I was telling you all about, but horror of horrors, there was a copy mistake in something I did. My superior noticed, tried to alert those with the power, and those with the power had already manufactured the fucker.

Fuck-fuckity-fuck-fuck-fuckery.

And to top it all off, this was one of the jobs I was extremely proud of due to the fact that it helped save us almost losing the account. But whilst I can still be proud of the concept, the copy is wrong and that is my fault.

In my review I had already been told that whilst I'm good at concepts, my writing itself isn't up to scratch yet. I was almost getting their with my writing skills a month or so back when I did a full copy ad, only for this shit to happen. Whilst I'm away. On leave. Chilling the mouse.

And then, to add to my stupidity, I took it out on my colleague next to me with a lot of raised voices and sweary words. Because of a doughnut.

Yes. A doughnut.

Now she's sulking. I've apologised but she's still pulling the cold-bitch routine (although she's steadily thawing out). Currently, I'm trying to do another job but the copy mistake is pissing the shit out of me. This is my second one. I do not like this.

I got a lot of shit in my last job. A lot of it was uncalled for, but the one comment that did have bearing was my sloppiness. I've since tried to remedy it, but it looks like I'm falling back into the trap.

And to any of my colleagues reading this, the doughnuts downstairs are shit. They're too doughy and taste like smoked meat.

4.5.05 04:12

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Well Cover Me In Peanut Butter And Call The Scatologists...

...CafePress has come a long fucking way since I last checked it out.

When they first started, they were just doing t-shirts and mugs with a 'more products coming soon' tag. Yeah, right. Like there'll be more products...

Now they've got all kinds of apparel, merchandise, CD's and books... holy crapola.

An idea is slowly brewing in my head... must check out CafePress more...

4.5.05 05:26

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The News of Last Night Continues...

Great. Heard just how messed up last night was for the team. Concept got changed again at night. Team stayed on till 6 in the morning, pissed off.

This is not productive for morale.

4.5.05 05:53

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Your Favourite Guest

Anyone remember Jo Guest?
Sure you do. Well, if you've lived in England between the mid 80's and mid 90's you should. Page 3 in the Sun for quite a bit? She was in that video with Blur. Country House, I think it was.

Go on! You remember.

Just got thinking about her for some reason. Well, actually no, I was thinking about the current perception of sexiness and beauty in models, and it got me thinking about Jo Guest.

As you can see from the photo, Jo's not incredibly stunning in a traditional super-model/pornstar kind of way. She's hot, very hot, incredibly hot, but she's not...

I dunno.

She's not super-duper-uber-hot.

And I mean that in a good way. She looks like the hot chick you knew at uni. The one everyone was clamouring for. Not the drop dead gorgeous Californian exchange student, no. Not even the French psychology student with the really pert breasts who would have you erect everytime she said 'excusez-moi'. No. She looks like the one you were friends with, the hot little lass from Hackney or Embankment. Or Sheffield.

She looks attainable.

I guess that's her thing. She's hot enough to stimulate your senses from just a mere visual, but that look on her face, the way she smiles (I like her smile), the expression... she's not from another world. I like that. I remember many an enjoyable moment in puberty holding a newspaper page of her in a french maids apron (I'd say outift, but I don't know where the rest of it went).

That's kinda rare these days, though, that look. I haven't seen it in awhile. Trying to look like your from another planet (or LA, which could be deemed another planet) has become the norm. Girls don't want to look just hot, they want the whole shebang. More human than human. Uberbabes.

But if all the babes were uberbabes, they wouldn't be too uber, would they?

Uber. Kinda like udder. Except not.

4.5.05 09:46

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Au Revoir, mon pere...

I was supposed to have lunch with my father this afternoon.

After the phonecall from last night the guilt bullet had been successfully lodged into my heart. "You come home late and leave early," he said. Not with anger, but a slight hint of sadness.

Ouch.

So I tell him we'll do lunch. I was all set. Was gonna bring him to the little Italian place with the glorious meatballs.

Then it turns out my art director will be dead for the next eight hours so it's up to me to go for the presentation this afternoon. No lunch with dad then. Instead, I'll be driving up a mountain where some mad Malaysian decided to build a supposedly authentic French city and present our company's super skills.

I should never have told them I did French GCSE, otherwise I wouldn't even be on this goddamn project.

5.5.05 05:45

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Eddy immortalized me.

He did. He's gone and made me into a South Park character using a site our friend Prem sent over.

Curious? Click here and scroll on down. I'm wearing an AC/DC t-shirt.

Dude, sweet.

6.5.05 05:48

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Ada Apa Dengan Alba?

So like, why do I like Jessica Alba so frickin' much?

Rewind a couple years back. During my break between my 2nd gloomy year and upcoming happy 3rd year at City uni, I was in KL hanging out with Jordan of Flatline fame and he was telling me about some movie called 'Idle Hands'.

"It's fucking funny as fuck and fuckin' kick fuckin' ass!" he exclaimed.

Ok. I'll take your word for it.
As fate would have it I stumbled upon the movie at the HMV whilst looking for some decent horror buys at the under 10 pounds section.

There it was. 'Idle Hands' starring Devon Sawa (Final Destination) as a lazy bastard who's hand is possessed and decides to kill people. First his parents, then his two best friends played by Seth Green (Buffy TV series and Austin Powers) and some other dude who's name I can't remember (sorry if you're reading this, dude, but I thought you rocked too, i'ight).

What I didn't know, and what Jordan failed to tell me, that the love interest in the movie was a certified grade-A hottie of epic proportions, Miss Jessica Alba.

I'd watch that movie with my flatmate and we just fell in love with her. Her cute little voice, her facial expressions, the way she moved...

That bit at the end when her dress is torn off and all she's wearing's her underwear. Lord help us.

I was enamoured. I'd been very picky when it came to female celebrities when I was younger. I've always felt that if these ladies wanted my complete admiration and devotion, they'd better be something. Either that or impress me with your talent. Or both. Bonus.

The girls of celluloid that had so far made my list (and my wall) during my teenage years pre-Alba were (in no particular order):

Christina Ricci - Casper. Gimme a break, I was a young teenager.

Natalie Portman - Pre-Star Wars. The whole Amidala thing does nothing for me.

Monica Belluci - L'Appartement. Watch L'Appartement. Wicker Park ain't got shit on L'Appartement.

Audrey Hepburn - Breakfast at Tiffany's. Nuff said.

Jessica Alba made the list. All thanks to Idle Hands. And I awaited her next movie.

I awaited for quite some time, actually. Dark Angel came out, I saw the trailer... and she had curly hair. some of the charm was lost. Then I saw the poster for Honey. More curly hair. Curly hair's a turn-off for me for some reason I can't explain. The whole world was falling in love with Dark Angel. I wasn't. Something was... missing. I did catch a few episodes, though, and it was cool, but I already had my fix of chick-action with Buffy.

There's also another movie she did called 'the Sleeping Dictionary' where she plays someone from Borneo. Keep seeing the DVD around at pirate stores. Might pick it up one day.

But the charm of when I first saw her, it wasn't there. Not in any of these movies and TV shows and it was beginning to piss me off.

All I can say now is thank God for Sin City. She's also got Fantastic Four and Into The Deep coming out. Amen. Amen amen amen.

Resident fanboy in the psyche of the Guber will sign out now, and leave you to regular Guber ramblings.

6.5.05 08:17

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For some reason my Jo Guest pic got turned into a huge Kylie pic for reasons I cannot fathom. Apologies for all the side-scrolliness earlier.

6.5.05 08:28

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So yeah...

I rushed home last night through a one and a half hour traffic jam in the hope of being able to have dinner with my parents, since they always complain I come home late.

I arrive and discover no-ones home.

I then decide to order pizza and watch Van Helsing and discover that the DVD is scratched.

I then try and post this up two minutes ago and discover that my computer's a fucking retard who decides to delete the post I just wrote on a whim, making me type out a new one that's much shorter and nowhere near as fun to read.

I'm good at this complaining lark, aren't I?

7.5.05 15:52

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